Name: Jiahui
Age: 22
School: auditor in training ntu acc njc st nicks peiying pri
Often known as: Queen

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The Queen Speaks

A place to ramble
A place to complain
A place for laughter
A place for tears
A place where the true me appears

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Wednesday, June 30, 2004

yESH ITS offICIAL!!!!!!

i lost one kg!!!!!!

hahahah lala over the moon now~

yEAH!
lallaa, am so v happy!!!!!
haha i love everione!!!!
*muacks*

Queen Tona @ 4:38 PM 0 comments

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Sunday, June 27, 2004

know wat it feels like to be empty?
its juz like someone came along and dug everithing outa u......
and den u look inside and u see a bottomless pit.....
and den u feel so cold and abandoned....
and all u have left is juz a plain shell.
u walk ard like any normal human beings.
but den deep down inside, there is nothng left.

terrible.
yesh, when u start to be able to do nothint to express urself.
when nothing can make u sad, and when u cannot even tear when u are sad.
u feel miserable and yet nobody noes.
u feel depressed and yet nobody cares.
u feel empty and yet nothing can be done to even lessen tat feeling.
and den u realise tat there is no cure to this emptiness.

u start lookin ard for things to fill up this empty feeling.
u start to look ard for ppl who can juz care a teeny weeny bit more.
u try to make things seem not so terrible.
u try to make urself look so happy, so fortunate
u tell urself u feel contented.
u tell urself u are happy.

at the end of they day,
u look deep inside u and realise, u are still feeling empty...
in fact u are feeling more empty den eva.

i am feeling so terribly empty now.

Queen Tona @ 10:44 PM 0 comments

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its stay home day~
in a grouchy mood haha.
yawnz.

*ROAR*
stay away!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Queen Tona @ 1:26 PM 0 comments

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Friday, June 25, 2004

k ppl forgive me but i have a major obssession with ice-skating
and anithing to do with iCE~
and yesh, my dream hse best to have a ice-skatin rink
so i can invite all my frens to come skate with me.
yippe~
haha and muz have pool table la, swimmin pool, eh transparent roof den can see stars~
huge garden, loads of 5566 etc etc.
haha shall add on more when i tink of any.

yawnz.

Queen Tona @ 10:36 PM 0 comments

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ten reasons y u sld go ice-skatin!!!!!
1)its super super fun and exciting and nice and wonderful!!!!!
2)in such a hot weather, the best thing is to come into contact with some ICE~
3)there is snow!!!! *gasp*
4)its a good form of exercise!!! yea shed some wt!
5)u can go ard at breakneck speed and no one cares. juz dun break ur neck
6)u can fall all u want and u wun hurt! juz dun create a hole la. =P
7)its v romantic too!! esp when the lights are off, u can go shoot ur own mtv.
8)there are good lookin guys!!! [droolz]
9)u can train up ur balancin skillS!
10)and of coz the best thing is to juz enjoy the cold wind on ur face as u skate ard the rink!!!!!

lala~ if i got money i shall go again! haha =)

Queen Tona @ 12:58 PM 0 comments

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Wednesday, June 23, 2004

oh boy how cld i forget to mention!!!!!!

i am going ice skatin tml!!!!!!

cant wait!!!!! *Screams*
aHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhh
yippE YAH!!!!!
yeah!!!!!!!
jubilanT~

Queen Tona @ 10:31 PM 0 comments

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yello. i am finally back in action~
aniwaz, today quite an eye-opener...
coz i went to the polyclinic for the first time~

its like ever since i wore my contacts to malacca on sun,
my left eye;s been feeling weird la. coz actually my contacts sorta dried and dropped off on sun prob coz i slept with it on for too long or wat.
so nvm, i thot nothing wrong until today my eye felt a bit swollen and got itchy.
so i decided to go polyclinic see see since its supposed to be cheap.

reached there abt 1.15 only to realised tat the docs will be back at two....
TERRIBLE.....
sat and stoned......
den finally mine turn!!!!!
given some eye drops and cannot wear contact lenses 4 3weeks.... =aniwaz it realli turn out to be quite cheap.
maybe i shall consider going there if i eva fall sick.
but tat is if i am not too sick coz its 10mins walk from my hse.

haha as for now,
eye drops here i come~

aniwaz, my template is working again coz i HOSTed the pic on my own! *pat pat*
arent i smart?

Queen Tona @ 10:12 PM 0 comments

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Tuesday, June 22, 2004

major revamp comin up thanks to the STUPID template.
F!!!!!!!!

Queen Tona @ 10:58 PM 0 comments

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Saturday, June 19, 2004

this is terrible......
i ate so much for this two days.....
yest i ate the extra yummy chicken briyani from northpt....
den today even worST!!!!
i ate chili crab and a zillion much more other dishes.....
my gawd. if i were to stand on a weighin scale now, i am bound to spoil it.....
=(
i muz be weighin 100kg now......
i am so depressEd...... =(
y did i eat so much..... y am i so greedy......
sob sob. and now i am a million miles away from my wishlist!!!!
i am gainin two million kg..... let alone lose two.....
URGH.
no more food for me nex week.
[haha coz i am off to malacca to eat more GOOD food tml.......]

hai.
dun be shocked if u see a bloated me...
oh wait, maybe i will be so bloated i cant leave the hse!
*screamS*

k off to try to catch some beauty sleep
coz i am settin off at an unearthly hr of 6am to avoid the jam
and to eat breakfast at JB~
yummie yum.
oh no.........

FAT fAt fat.

Queen Tona @ 10:20 PM 0 comments

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Friday, June 18, 2004

i seriously tink my entire life revolves ard this mathematical rule.
the amt of effort i spent is inversely proportional to the amt of
recognition i get in return.
hurmph.
its not tat i realli need anithing in return
but wtf, dun make me feel like a bloody fool all rite....

forget it, sometimes, i realli dun mind being a bloody fool.
i only have myself to blame.
becoz i rather be a fool den to be a nobody to u.

Queen Tona @ 10:26 PM 0 comments

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Thursday, June 17, 2004

yesh. accordin to my mood forecast on the left, i am depressed!!!!!!!
and y?
let me see. i was happily shopping for father;s day gift...
got a belt.
den i was cravin for red bean icecream.....
so i walked to the auntie who sold it lah.
"auntie, please give me one red bean icecream"
"aiyo, sorry mai wan le!"

and yes tats y i am depressed.........
i am realli cravin for it......
omg.......
my dearest red bean icecream.

=(
i am sad.
v sad.
depressed.
boo hoo hoo.
my red bean icecream...........

Queen Tona @ 9:58 PM 0 comments

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Wednesday, June 16, 2004

this is so urgh...
after much changin of dates etc....
i am still finally going to malacca on 20june......
which means tat my ktv session is a gonner.....
hurmph.

and i am in a v bad mood now!
BAH!
i want to eat up ppl.

Queen Tona @ 10:53 PM 0 comments

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Tuesday, June 15, 2004

i hereby conclude tat all guys are jerks.
they are simply the most unsensitive creatures tat i have eva known.
urhg.
sometimes things they do/say/dun do/dun say juz pissed the hell outa me.
and i mean it.
and wats the worst? they dun seem to sense anithing.
oh man, are they made of wood or wat?
den here we are, as emotional women, feeling depressed and sad and wat hav u over the things that they have done.

and den u come to tink of it, the entire thing makes no sense at all.
becoz guys will alwaz be guys, gals will alwaz be gals.
and the entire thing juz seem ridiculous.
gals get angry, guys duno they are wrong, and at the end of everything?
its a total waste of time and energy.

wait a min.
y am i even bloggin on this?
wastin my time complainin abt jerks.
madness.

Queen Tona @ 10:22 PM 0 comments

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Monday, June 14, 2004

lalala. guess wat? my parents went on a movie date, so now its only me and my bro stuck at home lor. =)
haha actually my mummie and daddie are quite cute one lah.
like small kids lidat one. =P

aniwaz, the weather is so freakin hot......
and i mean HOT!!!!
feel like soakin up in a huge tub of water hahah and enjoy a massage?
wah bestest!!!!!!

urgh... too hot to even tink straight and blog!!!!

its so hot,
its so hot,
its SOOOOOOOOOoooooooooo hoT,
its so v hot!!!!!

thank u, how was my its so hot song?
hahah k enuff of crapZ

Queen Tona @ 10:48 PM 0 comments

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Sunday, June 13, 2004

this is so f-ed up
why the hell is it tat u get the best of evrything and me nothing?
i hate u
i hate u
i hate u.
i detest u to the ultimate......
y isit tat u are the lucky gal and me the unlucky one.

u tink u are a bloody angel?
den wat am i now?
the huge devil rite?
i hate u!!!!!!!!
u tink u are nice? i can be nicer
u tink u are pretty? i am prettier!!!!!!

everything that u can do, i can do it a thousand times better.
den y isit tat u are the lucky one?
i am so bloody jealous.

and tats y i detest u, i hate u.
u have no idea how much ur presence makes my blood boil.
wateva it is, get outa my sight.
get outa my mind and dun eva let me see u.

urgh.
wats wrong with me.
i hate myself!

Queen Tona @ 1:31 PM 0 comments

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Saturday, June 12, 2004

been's a long day today. but shall start off with.......

happy bday my dear han wei!!!!!!!

haha, aniwaz, today been's rushin the entire day sorta.
went back to njc to took cert first plus the college magz.
and surprisingly its not RED!!!!! haha, not tat its any betta when compared to st nicks,
but well, its an improvement la hor?
heck, i guess tat realli marks the end of my relationship with tat sch.
its strange to think tat i may not even stepped back there anymore.
i cant sae there arent any fond memories i haf of tat sch,
aiyarz, let;s juz sae some are really sweet, some are bittersweet and some are juz plain plain plain bitter.

after tat, headed to town while the rest wenta giant to get food for the bbq.
town was crowded, expected. aiyarz, s'poreans are deprived of leisure places la.
bought bread from bread talk and headed for b king at far east.
slack slack, talk talk, eat eat b4 headin to sentosa.

seriously speakin, its been damn long since i last step into there
haha feel quite excited!!!! but all the places so ex if not i wld have gone and explore ard man..... but one bad thing...... it cost a freakin 3 bucks juz to step into sentosa.....
totaly sian diaoz. after tat, took monorail and headed for palawan beach.
haha felt like tourists lor, so farni, but monorail a bit slow la, though the view is quite nice too. esp the sea, sparking! nice~
not forgettin to mention the weather was perfect, ideal for beach man!!!! wonderful!!!!
aniwaz, reach the beach, and headed for the bbq pit.
not bad la, the turn out was already considered v good le.

aniwaz, apparently guys were all talkin abt ns stuff la, wat else??
somehow i tink, some of the ppl really change quite a bit.
i mean character wise, outlook wise, its like u see them change for the better la.
changes? have i even changed a single weeny bit at all?
i guess i have, circumstances made me change. it forecs me to change.
i duno if it has been for a better cause, but heck, changes are changes.

talkin abt tat, haha major change for me recently has been my haircut yest!!!!!
haha, actually i juz did it in a spur of the moment i guess.
its like i was juz tellin xr tat i dun want cut, den after tat juz decided to.
zr sae i seem as if i encountered some major changes in my life, or suffer a huge blow haha
i guess to a certain extent its true, y did i cut my hair?
i guess a new look signifances a new beginning bah.
sianz la, but its so not going to work i am so sure of tat.
its juz this kinda bluffin urself thingy tat makes urself feel betta.
but well, i do feel a teeny weeny more relieved and happy after my hair cut.
haha so i shall heck abt all comments abt it.

oh wow realise i have been typing till sunday haha u get wat i mean?
suddenly realise tat it seems as if a lot of ppl are gettin themselves troubled by the stupid thing called love.
actually love is supposed to be a v simple thing.
but yet again, it can be such a fatal weapon la.
y are we even lettin ourselves get affected rite?
do we realli have nothing better to do? tats y we start to look 4 something to trouble abt?
i cant sae i am not a victim myself coz i am. i so very am.
in fact, i cld have gotten a memebership card le.

i mean, ok la its good to be emotional, to be in a sense "feeling" sometimes.
but seriously dun make it affect ur life till the extend that u start to forget ur priorities lor. for eg, studies...... hai.... feelin so sad for those who let their heart rule over their mind..... and den wat u get in the end? u dun do tat well, and no one is gonna noe how terrible a life u have led for that period of time.
WTF, is it even worth the trouble, the torture.
like as if tat jerk tat bastard will even give a damn la.

haha aniwaz, been tinkin abt this question
"are gals all emotional?"
me? i can be v emotional, i can be v emotinonless bah.
juz like a cycle.
v emotional. v bad. cry at the slightest things.
get depressed easily.
v emotionless. v bad too. nothing seems to concern u.
u find urself numb. u find urself detach from the world.
so i guess it means i am totally uncurable.

u noe wat it means when i blog long entires.
i means the lonely bug is in action again.
yes, i hate to admit it but its true,
so i juz sit in front of this lifeless obj and start to type my hearts out.
i realli duno wats with me these few days.
sometimes i look ard and i feel v thankful,
sometimes i look ard and i feel so pitiful.
am i going insane?
y such drastic differences i duno.

sometimes i wish nothing eva change, and yet sometimes i wish i had the power to change everithing.........

Queen Tona @ 11:40 PM 0 comments

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haha M1 rules!!!!! i using M1!!!!!!!
tony is so shuai!!!!! *faint*
*droolZ*

k beta get ready to go off to njc and sentosa~

Queen Tona @ 11:45 AM 0 comments

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Friday, June 11, 2004

I want to be remembered as the girl that always smiled, and the one who could always brighten your day; even when she couldn't brighten her own

took it off somewhere.
thought its a bit meaningful.
cut my hair today.
i was supposed to not touch it.
wateva.

tink the world's becomin v weird.
with weird ppl.
like tat stupid taiwan woman ms xu.
totally grossed up.
almost puke my dinner out but it wun be worth it.
she is totally uncurable, full of herself and ego like hell.
u noe wat she needs? a mirror.
total PUKEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeee.

mood`s spoilt coz i am now sharin the same air as her.
she had beta leave soon.

Queen Tona @ 10:59 PM 0 comments

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Wednesday, June 09, 2004

yawnz. i am in a sleepy mood after associatin with sleeping beauty for too long.
realli la, wat do u get when sleeping beauty is hauntin u wif "i wana sleep"
at a speeed of 5times/min?
hehez. =P

happy not sleeping beauty? i dedicated the entire entry here for ya.
haha basically to thank ya for ur book aso and dun worrie
i wun forget ur 25cents icecream as long as u are not too sleepy to eat it!!!
hahahahha
hehehehz
hohohohoz

[ y do i have the feeling tat i will get killed when i post this entry? ]

Queen Tona @ 11:05 PM 0 comments

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Tuesday, June 08, 2004

have i eva told anione of u how much i juz utterly hate myself?
so much so tat i wanna juz literally bash myself up?
i am everything i sld not be.
i am nothing i sld be.
wat am i?
ani one of u tink u noe me well?
guess wat, i dun even noe who i am myself.
i am in denial, i am in deception.
i am juz wastin air, water, food on earth.
y dun i see myself succeedin in anithing?

y isit tat after so long after so much i have done,
i look back and i dun get anithing in return,
in fact, have things even improved at all.
i am simply tired of pickin myself up time and time again and telling myself
tat everythin will be ok.
becoz, wat the hell, nothing is all rite at all.

and den wat happens? once in a blue moon i come here and blabber my hearts out
and den everything backs to normal again.
tats life isnt it.
wat else can i do.....

y isit tat when i compare my life with others,
i find it juz so terribly empty. so terribly cold. so terribly depressing.
am i realli such a terrible person?

yes perhaps, i am.


-Everytime-
Come notice me
And take my hand
So why are we
Strangers when
Our love is strong
Why carry on without me?

And everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings
I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, it's haunting me
I guess I need you baby

I make believe
That you are here
It's the only way
I see clear
What have I done
You seem to move on easy

And everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings
I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, it's haunting me
I guess I need you baby

I may have made it rain
Please forgive me
My weakness caused you pain
And this song is my sorry

Ohhhh

At night I pray
That soon your face
Will fade away

And everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings
I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, it's haunting me
I guess I need you baby

After all...
After all...

Queen Tona @ 10:38 PM 0 comments

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Monday, June 07, 2004

Twinkle twinkle little star,
How I wonder what you are,
Up above the world so high,
Like a diamond in the sky,
Star light,
Star bright,
The first star I see tonight,
I wish I may, I wish I might,
Have the wish I wish tonight,

Twinkle twinkle little star,
How I wonder what you are,
I have so many wishes to make,
But most of all is what I state,
So just wonder,
That I've been dreaming of,
I wish that I can have owe her enough,
I wish I may, I wish I might,
Have the dream I dream tonight,

Ooo baby

Twinkle twinkle little star,
How I wonder what you are,
I want a girl who'll be all mine,
And wants to say that I'm her guy,
Someones sweet that's for sure,
I want to be the one shes looking for,
I wish I may, I wish I might,
Have the girl I wish tonight,

Ooo baby

Twinkle twinkle little star,
How I wonder what you are,
Up above the world so high,
Like a diamond in the sky,
Star light,
Star bright,
The first star I see tonight,
I wish I may, I wish I might,
Have the wish I wish tonight.

Queen Tona @ 4:34 PM 0 comments

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Sunday, June 06, 2004

all rite~ check out my new wish list on the left~
yippe yah.

Queen Tona @ 11:28 PM 0 comments

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Friday, June 04, 2004

aniwaz, gals came over to watch shrek 2.
quite ok show la, but its rather short. not realli worth a movie ticket prize though.
oh yah one impt thing, congraz xr on gettin in business!!!
haha yea~ so now we wil be studyin the same thing at least 4 the first yr.

after tat, was on our way for dinner.
so we were walkin along this concrete path and talkin,
when siru screamed, xr screamed and we all startin running.
after a dist, we stopped. me was still blur blur din noe wat happen.
den it occured tat our poor siru has accidentally stepped on a baby bird
which apparently has fallen from the nest which is inside the hole of the mrt track.
accordin to them, the bird did give a "painful cry" but i din hear la.

aniwaz, the poor baby bird was lying in the middle of the path,
den this uncle walk past and sorta pushed or rather kicked it to the side...
den we headed back to the place of the "accident" and took a closer look...
so sad lor, the poor bird looks so helpless and pitiful....
somemore the worst thing is its too young so it cant fly lor...
hai....... so worried tat ppl may accidentally stepped on it again.....

after tat, we felt so kelian and sad for the baby bird tat we ate vegeterian stuff lor.
aiyarz, realli lor, the birh realli v pitiful la.
so ppl, lets pray for the baby bird k..... hopefully it will be able to survive until its big enuff to fly back to the nest la...... if not..... HAI.

aiyoyo...... the poor baby BIRD........ =(
sometimes life's tat cruel la huh.....
i am so sure it will feel so cold esp at nite..... SAD.
i feel so sad for it, somemore i v scared to go back and see in case.......
boo hooo hooooo......

pray pray pray

Queen Tona @ 10:52 PM 0 comments

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ok la, i admit i juz refuse to grow up. =X

My inner child is six years old!

Look what I can do! I can walk, I can run, I can
read! I like to do stuff, and there's a whole
big world out there to do it in. Just so long
as I can take my blankie and my Mommy and my
three best friends with me, of course.


How Old is Your Inner Child?
brought to you by Quizilla

Queen Tona @ 2:18 PM 0 comments

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yawnz realise that i haven been updateing much recently.
haha aniwaz, yest wenta yet another engagement/weddin party at chalet.

yes yes, its yet another of my cousins, and yes its yet another complicatin relationship.
the gal is from indonesia and my cousin juz seem to get to noe her a few mths ago when he went over for work or something.
and i seriously haven seen her b4 la...
and oh well, the gal is returning nex mon to indonesia and seriously
i am ???? i ask my mum so wats their future plans, my mum sae they aso duno.
i mean, its confirm tat the gal cant get a PR here coz she is not v well educated and my cousin is almost definitely not gonna go stay at indonesia permanently,
so seriously wats gonna happen after this wedding?
heck,

seriously sometimes i tink i have more brains den my older cousins.
they juz tend to do things that leave me in utter bewilderment. =X
or maybe its coz u see things from the 3 party;s view coz when u are in the picture,
u tend to tink that "love can conqueur all" " i love her and tats most impt" tat kinda rubbish.

heck, i swear tat i am not going repeat ani of my cousins' mistakes.
when its my turn to hold an engagement party/ wedding dinner,
i will make sure i have the perfect guy standing right beside me,
the one who i am confident and sure of.
haha by then, i will be the most lucky gal on earth and everione will be so envious of me!!!!!

oh well, tats still a long way down the road.
i am not even in love now,
yawnz, shall see who will have the power to make me fall head over heels la huh?

till then, i am still single and available!!! hahah =P

Queen Tona @ 2:02 PM 0 comments

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Tuesday, June 01, 2004

haha ppl listen up.
the top of my wishlist

marimo!!!!!!

aniwaz, marimo is an algae la sorta.
which grows 5mm per year!!! so cute rite?
den u muz take good care of it den it will grow one la.
its sold in heerens alternatives.... and i realli realli dying to want it....
its so cute..... so furry lidat..... and somemore its alive!!!!!
hai.... but its ex.
whoevas buys me tat, i will marry him hahah
[ will tat stop ppl from buying me tat instead? ]

dun care, my dear marimo......
if i eva get a job. the first thing i will do is to get my marimo!!!!!!!
*muacks*

Queen Tona @ 10:24 PM 0 comments

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