Name: Jiahui
Age: 22
School: auditor in training ntu acc njc st nicks peiying pri
Often known as: Queen

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The Queen Speaks

A place to ramble
A place to complain
A place for laughter
A place for tears
A place where the true me appears

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Friday, December 31, 2004

hmmm, cant believe it, today is the last day of 2004....
and conincidentally also the last day for the channel u and i ppl....

i duno y everytime i see them do the farewell thingy for the channel u and i
i juz have the urge to tear....
i remember tuning in to their first day of the programs....
frantically tryin to tune my tv and all....
the image is still so very clear....

their dream has ended....
wat abt mine?
my own fabricated dream....
does it juz goes to tell me tat its time mine ends too...
i guess.

2004.
wat have i acheived?
wat have i contributed?
*shrugs*

as i look back i see so many flashes....
happiness, tears, laughter....
it has been an eventful year.
but yet again, it has been a smooth and peaceful year....

isn't that enough?
i dun need to have huge acheivements or contributions.
all i ask is for things to go smoothly, for everything to be peaceful and nice,
for the world to be a better place.... for everyone to be free from saddness, free from danger,
for everione ard me and of coz myself to have good health, to be happy alwaz...
tats most impt.

so for 2005...
i juz hope that there will be no more terror attacks, no more major natural disaters, no more huge obstacles that my family, friends or myself have to cross....
i juz hope that everione can be happy, be contented with what they have, and be thankful for wat and where we all are today.

ok wateva, aniwaz, i am going to see slyvester later!!!!!!!!
nothing can describe my excitement siaz.
realli!!!!!!

and hope tml dun rain, coz i am going sentosa!!!!!!!!
yippEEEEeee

Queen Tona @ 1:33 PM 0 comments

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Thursday, December 30, 2004

hai. news are so very depressing nowadays, i am tryin my best to skip them.
=(

Queen Tona @ 10:24 PM 0 comments

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Wednesday, December 29, 2004

rite, congrat me coz i juz carried or dragged 9kg of books, yes i weighed them, from my hall to town den to outram den back to my hse.........
my fingers dun feel like fingers.

so wats the 1st thing u need to suceed in ur studies?
muscles to help u carry the books home FIRST.
=P

lalaz, new year comin, sch starting~
muz enjoy myself b4 i start mugging~
lalaz

=)

and do ya noe they show 2hrs episodes of MVP on TV this week.
gosh its such a luxury. *DroolZ*

Queen Tona @ 10:13 PM 0 comments

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Monday, December 27, 2004

gals doing the last poise for cheerleading,guys extra whahha. =P  

Queen Tona @ 10:08 PM 0 comments

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one big happy family. see the banner behind. ok a bit blocked but well hehez. thats wat we painted lar, drawings by junliang =) 

Queen Tona @ 10:07 PM 0 comments

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so sad, the earthquake that happened killed so many ppl....
and affected so many countries.
hai..............

moody moody.
hope those affected can get back to normal life as soon as possible~
*prays*

Queen Tona @ 10:09 AM 0 comments

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Sunday, December 26, 2004

us and the 38club haha see the roses we are holding they give one lar of coz!!!! thanks guys for coming!!!!  

Queen Tona @ 10:47 PM 0 comments

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gals of the dance.
me, han wei, yuling, fang wen
weber aka zhiyue xiaoyan jie, fang fang, and qing ying

wonderful job done gals~
i love u all!!!!!!!

Queen Tona @ 10:39 PM 0 comments

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hmmm, so i guess xmas is over~
slackin now, going to fo tang later to watch vcd of that dinner thingy
and discuss some stuff.

so how, did u all get wat u wanted for xmas?
i guess i have.
i am easily contented! =)
haha i guess some of u will noe wat i mean lar.
cannot put down too implicitly coz there are others reading too~

wannna noe come ask me lar =)

Queen Tona @ 1:09 PM 0 comments

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Saturday, December 25, 2004

merrrie x mas~

long tired day
in short it was fun~

1) ate pastamania for lunch
2) watch kungfu hustle
3) played pool at monsterque
4) ate pizza hut for dinner
5) sorta skim thru the lightings and went hmv.

tired........ legs very suan.
=/

prob will blog more in depth when i shuang haha.

Queen Tona @ 11:06 PM 0 comments

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Friday, December 24, 2004

yawnz.
its xmas eve and i shall be stuck at home.

ok, i tink i sld write something impt here first~
thanks!!!!!
haha, u noe who u are, for being the "santa claus" and delivering the x mas card rite to my door step....
i alreadi sae i dun mind belated cards le but u still made the effort to make it on time~
it may be juz a small small card but its the thot tat counts~
hehez, realli leh i quite touched siaz. =)
wan cry le!
haha ok lar, so this yr's most valued x mas card award shall go to u!

aniwaz, yep back to the main thing.....
stuckin at home on x mas eve....
5 reasons:

1] i wanna avoid stampede
2] i have no money to indulge in xmas feast
3] i am quite sianz abt the whole idea of x mas
4] i dun feel like forcin myself to enjoy certain ppl's company
5] the only one person i wan go out with did not ask me out! hurmph! =) hahaz.

k laterz.

Queen Tona @ 2:14 PM 0 comments

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Thursday, December 23, 2004

As u all noe, I am now currently in the MVP craze….
today’s episode was especially nice coz it was supposed to be tai zi and xiao xi
going out on a "date".
i mean oh well, besides the fact that got my fav tai zi, there are of coz other reasons
why today's episode is so very nice rite?
coz today's espisode showed tai zi sayin and doing v touchin things for xiao xi, despite the fact
that he noe that xiao xi is still very much in love with tat duan cheng feng although they sort of broke up.

i cant remember the exact phrasing of wat tai zi said but it was something like " you do not have to be afraid of being alone, of having to face all the problems alone, of havin to cry alone coz u can be very sure that no matter what, i will alwayz be here for u, as long as u need me to."
guardian angel, yesh, thats the first thing that came to my mind when i was watching this.

does anyone out there have a guardian angel by your side? always ready to be there for u when u eva need someone. juz like an angel sent from heaven, alwayz there.....
i duno, i dun think i have one.
oh well, i guess not everyone can have the privilegde of having one rite?

someone once told me that he is very much willing to be my guardian angel,
" don't cry, don't worry, i will try my best to be your guardian angel, to be there to protect u"
but no, actions speak louder den words.
where were u when i was alone?
where were u when i was feeling helpless?
where were u when i was crying in the dark?
where were u when i was tired?
where were u when i need u?

i am not trying to rant and go on to blame whoever it is for not being there for me.
won't it be a complete joke if i have to even force someone to fulfil something
he prob wun remember promising.
it will juz make me look so very pathetic.

no, i cannot show anyone that i am such a weak gal, especially him.
i will survive and i have survived so far.
of coz at times when i feel so tired, so troubled, so depressed,
at times when i find myself crying alone in the middle of the nite,
at times when i juz lose hope and confidence in myself,
i realli hope that someone will appear and give me the promise to be there, to guard me.

but i noe that, i must be strong, i muz be independent.
i cannot be like other gals, who can go runnin into the comfort of their other halfs when they
eva need any support and comfort, who can cry at the slightest thing becoz they noe their other halfs will make things rite for them, who can have a very lousy day but prob juz hearin from their other halfs will juz make their day wonderful again.

hai, yes i am feeling shitty again, tats why i bother to write such long and meaningless entries.
sometimes i wonder when will it eva be my turn again to start to have someone for me to reply and depend on.
when will i eva be my turn to throw a silly tantrum and noe that he will definitely do things to make me happy again.
when will i eva be my turn to stop acting tough and to start being a weak gal all over again.

hai, enuff of such rubbish, my fone's spoilt again, the dumb key pad but i realli dun wanna go to nokia care...
coz v sianz i tink they will reformat my fone again and my msgs will be gone.
tats the last thing i need to happen lar huh....... shall see how.

u have no idea how safe u made me feel,
how happy u made me feel,
how excited u made me feel,
i am falling, real fast, real soon.
how abt u?

but why isit that somehow i feel that i am juz headin for yet another heartache,
yet another session of tears, yet another time of unrealistic hopes.
i am really scared.... can u juz let me cling on to u, even if its only for a while?
even if its only for a short while............
pls......

Queen Tona @ 5:02 PM 0 comments

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Wednesday, December 22, 2004

latest craze of mine~
taizi!!!!!!!
*muacks*

Queen Tona @ 3:28 PM 0 comments

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Tuesday, December 21, 2004

=)
i am a happy gal today, i guess u all noe why.
but the only thing is, i wonder if u do noe why.

its the familiar warm and fuzzy feeling.
even if its juz virtual words on the fone....

u have no idea how u made my day.
how i wish i can made urs too~

Queen Tona @ 10:23 PM 0 comments

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Monday, December 20, 2004

=)

last nite
was staring at the fone, comtemplating if i sld msg u when
the fone went *beep*
and it was you.
i wonder if u noe how happy i felt.
haha i felt like a young gal who has just gotten a new toy~
and the one and only toy in the world siaz~~

i wonder how u felt.
wat were u thinkin/feeling when u replied my msgs.
were u even half as happy and excited as me?

but the only stupid thing was i fell asleep while waiting for one of ur replies.
oh well at least i went to sleep with many happy thots.
how abt ya, were u at least a little bothered that i din reply?

lalala, wateva it is, i am over the moon.
i am feeling happy coz of ya, are u feeling happy coz of me?

hmmmmmmmm, will ya msg me again later tonite?
=P

Queen Tona @ 9:36 PM 0 comments

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Sunday, December 19, 2004

sometimes i realli wonder why am i always involved in the stupid guessing game.
*sigh*

do you feel the same kinda feeling i feel?
do u mean what u say?
what was the reason behind ur actions?
or am i thinking too much into these?
haiz.

sometimes i wish all my feelings and all can be reflected back to me juz like the mirror,
instead of how it is in the past where it all juz goes down into a bottomless pit.

haiz.
i hate it,
i hate the festive season.
i hate it when its christmas eve, or wateva eve and everione starts to spend time with their significant half and i look ard and realise hmmmmmm
i dun have any.

how i wish somehow......
somehow...... the miracle that i am hoping for will finally arrive......
i wish.......
i wish i haven been guessing wrong....
i wish u can at least give me some form of assurance...
i wish ur smile was coz of me, i wish ur laughter was coz of me,
i wish............

do wishes come true?

Queen Tona @ 10:32 PM 0 comments

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yo ppl~
haha juz reached home not long ago.
ok shall write a long entry today larz huh?
to compensate for the past few weeks..........

of coz the hitelite for today's entry sld be last nite's dinner plus performance!
overall it was wonderful......... ok let's touch on details den.
haha coz i am sure 38club aso din noe wat happen b4 the performance which nearly gave me a heart attack.

reached the place ard 2plus lidat and started to put up deco.
sew the cloth aka the banner aka the backdrop, den others did the balloons etc.
it was quite fun larz huh except tat there was still no aircon at that time so v hot.
so v sticky aso.
den ard 4plus five everything almost done.
was supposed to start the proper rehearsal at five coz we haven done the thing on stage b4.

so ard tat time the sound ppl came.
tried the music. and to everyone's horror.......... the music tat we gals using cannot be read by the player that those sound ppl have.
dun ask me y, prob got to do with the fact tat it was a burned cd.......
when i knew abt it, duno lehz, rite at tat very pt, my mind juz went blank.
so nvm, they sae that hurry go hmv to buy the bring it on soundtrack since the version tat we use which is shorter than the original song is from there......
so tian peng drove me there, and WTF along the wae v heavy jam plus no parking space etc.
waste a whole load of time
den along the wae, tp was like aiyarz hmv sure have etc, tell me dun worrie.......
so reach hmv, ask the person help us find the soundtrack and guess wat.
no more stock. wonderful........
den the person found one for us but den it was the original full verison and i mean the one we use is 3plus mins and the original one was 4plus mins.......

at that pt of time i realli panic le.
realli. u have no idea how it feels to be "music-less" juz 2hrs b4 the performance
with no real rehearsal done and all and i was still in the t shirt and shorts and slippers and all.
haven change haven done anithing and the most impt thing is we of coz need the music and the rite version.....
so i fone xyjie and she sae they going back to take the fotang dvd player to try and den i told her the long version thing and she sae juz buy first and if realli cannot the gals can dun dance le.

i duno larz, on the journey back i tried to tink of steps to fill up the extra time of the song
but den, even if i manage to get the gaps filled up and all, its v hard to get everione to remember the changes and all and i am like, i duno......
at a total loss.
by the time we returned back to the place i tink it was six plus.....
and the dvd player thing haven arrive and i was more panicky than eva.....
i mean, if we cannot get the music up and all, i feel tat partly my fault,
and if we realli needa use the different and longer music and if the performance turned out to be a total flop, its def coz of me too since i am supposed to make sure the dance is at least presentable .......
so i aso duno y, i juz panic and started crying......
yes, less den 2hrs to the performance and i am still there listenin to the new version, tryin to tink of moves to fill up the extra time and wiping my tears..........

so finally when the dvd player arrived and the version tat we used can be played,
i am realli realli realli v relieved........
so i cried again. =X
actually i duno, did i put too much pressure on myself?
i juz felt that if after so much practices and sacrifices of time and energy by all the gals,
if the performance were to turn out to be a flop juz coz of the prob of the stupid music,
i sld be at fault coz i sld have at least checked the music b4 hand or even tried to get the original soundtrack b4 hand etc.
i duno larz, if the dvd player realli aso cannot work yesterday,
i duno what will happen, i juz noe i will feel so bad coz i feel as if i let down everyone.

so hehez, after tat rush thru the hair and make up and did a short rehearsal both for the dance and the cat-walk.........
yesh, ppl u din see wrongly lar, cat-walk
whahha, i realli tink its only in this kinda farni occasion tat u eva catch me doing such things u noe?
cat-walk?!?!? like huh?!?!? me?!?!?
aniwaz coz they had to auction stuff so we juz supposed to parade around with the stuff etc.
haha i tink 38 club will find it so farni.

and i thot the dinner was nicer den the previous yr one,
hope 38club din find it too awful and the programme too boring.
hehez, they v sweet yea! bought us cos gals flowers!
realli guys, thanks for takin time off and coming to watch us~
hope we din perform too badly hahaz.

so after the dinner took fotos etc,
den headed back to fotang for celebrationS~
actually nothing too happening coz everyone's tired,
juz drink drink eat eat exchange prezzie, play uno and daidee
den ended up everione "pitch" their own sleeping area and watch some movie
and of coz me drifted off to sleep somewhere in between the show~.

hmmmm, finally after much busy-ness, the dinner's over.
realli larz, rite from the beginning from choosing the song to cheorographing to teachin the steps to days and days of prac, to paintin banner for back-drop, to costumes etc.
it has been tiring but v v fun~.
made some new frens and it has def brought everione closer too.
i am juz so glad the performance ended well and i tink everione tried their best too~

so yep, ok tats all larz ranting too much.
blog more when i have inspiration~

Queen Tona @ 1:03 PM 0 comments

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Saturday, December 18, 2004

hehez.
the performance is in less den 12hrs~
yawnz.
slackin at home now, resting.
packing coz we stayin over for celebrations after tat.

hmmmmmmm, this is so exciting~
ok prob take some fotos and put them up soon!
laterz
wish me luck hahaz

Queen Tona @ 9:40 AM 0 comments

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Friday, December 17, 2004

thats it ppl!!!!!!!!!!!!
my results!!!!!!!

ACCounting - C [whahha i passED!!!!! *muacks*]
Financial manangement - B
stATs - A
OrganisaTional Behavoiur - B

yippe yahz
i am a happy gal.

Queen Tona @ 1:06 PM 0 comments

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Tuesday, December 14, 2004

this is odd.
i have been havin the same dream for several days.
me and him.
u noe how when in dreams u neva realli get to see ppl's faces
yah i neva realli got to see his face, but somehow i juz noe its him.
sucks.
dun tell me i haven fallen, coz there isn;t anithing gd abt fallin too fast, too soon

wateva.
results gonna be out soon.
i am so v positively sure tat acc1 will stick with me in sem2 AGAIN.
boo hoo hoo.
the image of an accounting student re-takin an accounting course is absolutely hilarious.

Queen Tona @ 9:46 AM 0 comments

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Monday, December 13, 2004

hee~ surprise!

sianz i tink i haven been bloggin for sucha long time that no one eva steps into here again.
=X
aniwaz, sat's the performance.
but the dance not even finished yet....... as in haven teach finish.
coz everione;s time v hard to coordinate and stuff.
haiz.
duno larz, quite sianz diaoz a bit
but den again quite excited whahha.
eh first time ok, tat i "create" a dance whahhaha.
everithing's quite settled.
the deco, the costumes etc.
lackin the pom-pons...... but well tat one can rush these few days.
so yep yep, the final show-down will be juz round the corner!!!!!!
=)
jia you!

anione wanna come watch?
whahha 50bucks per tickeT!!!!!!
ok lar beg me and i give u discount.
eh i can give free tickets too but its taken by 38club le~
so nex yr lar huh? queue first whahha

and aniwaz, i tink i most prob going to move outa hostel nex sem.
duno lehz, dun quite like the idea.........
so yep good bye hall 9!
i wun miss u whahhaha.
=P

k off to prac~~~~~~~~~~~

Queen Tona @ 10:48 AM 0 comments

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Sunday, December 05, 2004

yoiEEEEEEEe
haha surprise appearance......
aiyo i realli wonder if anione still reads this.........

yawnz. juz some update.
got the entire dance "createD"
wohoooooooo~~~~
it doesn't contain the best dance moves, or the most exciting steps......
but oh well, at least it contains mine effort, and i tried my besT!
hehez, it feels good to cheorograph the entire dance by urself~!

so the performance's in 2weeks time.
busy with all the deco, dance prac, costumes etc........
no time to go out and havoc much also........
nvm lar, its all 4 a good cause i guess.

oh aniwaz, i got a new hair cut a week ago....
and i did a hair extension, so now i have a purple strand of hair siaz.
hahaz. crapz.

k laterz.

Queen Tona @ 10:33 PM 0 comments

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